A Scottish Christmas Story

On Christmas Eve Josh and I flew off to Scotland for our very first Christmas vacation. From what we’ve heard and assumed, the UK seemed like the perfect place to spend the holidays. Maybe it’s just because we watched Love Actually one too many times, but whatever the reason, at 7pm we were eating Christmas Eve dinner in Wetherspoon’s Restaurant in Stansted Airport and by 9:30pm we’d arrived in Edinburgh full of holiday spirit, ready to paint the town tartan.

After the train ride, plane ride, cab ride and hotel check-in, all we wanted was a drink and an appetizer. We just needed a little something to take the edge off and mark the festive occasion. It was a nice thought with one minor miscalculation: apparently you can’t get food at 10pm on Christmas Eve anywhere in Edinburgh—seriously, anywhere, not even in the hotel. And that was only the beginning. From Christmas Eve to Christmas Day and in some cases even Boxing Day, most bars, restaurants and attractions were closed for the holidays. Whoops!

The city of Edinburgh

Despite 20 degree weather and frozen streets we managed to find a quaint bar that was willing to pour a round of drinks before closing up. We ordered two spirits, split a bag of peanuts and Doritos, and watched as other bewildered tourists (probably from our flight) asked the bartender where they could get something to eat. The fact that nothing was open was certainly not in the brochure! But I should’ve guessed this was going to happen when back in November I called around to make dinner reservations for Christmas Day, and after an hour, found one restaurant in all of Edinburgh that was serving food. Did they expect everyone to starve—or be smart enough to visit after Christmas? Our own hotel wasn’t much help either. Not a vending machine, room service menu or mini bar in sight. I had visions of us curled up in a corner like starving mice waiting for Christmas to end so we could get few scraps food.

Luckily the hotel did serve Christmas breakfast and we feasted on haddock with poached eggs and scrambled eggs with smoked salmon and toasted brioche. Not your typical fare, but it was absolutely delicious! Later we found a pub that served lunch and we went to the sole open restaurant where I’d made reservations so many weeks prior for a sit-down dinner. To be honest, I wouldn’t say it was a “Christmas dinner”, or a “festive dinner”, or even a “good dinner”, but it was a dinner. So we didn’t starve and even though nothing in the city was open on Christmas Eve or Christmas Day, we actually had a really nice afternoon watching Christmas movies in our hotel room and talking to our families back home.

Josh in his Christmas crown

The ever-popular Christmas Crackers

By Boxing Day more shops and stores were opened and the day after that the city was buzzing. It was amazing how the streets that were once dark and vacant, later glowed with New Years excitement. This was when the real Scottish fun kicked in and we were introduced to whiskey, William Wallace and Martin Wishart—among other things.

The Scotch Whiskey Experience

I’ll have you know that Josh and I are now whiskey connoisseurs and we have the certificates to prove it! The Scotch Whiskey “Platinum” Experience is a 90-minute tour, tasting and talk about all things whiskey—with a few added surprises. The whiskey tour began with a mechanical barrel ride (think amusement park for middle-aged business men) through a mach distillery for a lesson on how single-malt whiskey is made. Following the tour, our guide brought us to a room, where we experienced a sensory lecture (which included scratch and sniff cards) and whiskey tasting.

We learned about the various whiskey-producing regions in Scotland and had the privilege of tasting two very different varietals: one from Speyside and one from Islay. We discovered that each region yields its own distinct flavor. Islay whiskeys are peaty and smoky (Josh’s favorite). Highland whiskeys can be dry and heathery or sweet and fruity and sometimes even a bit smoky. Speyside whiskeys are described as mellow, sweet, malty and fruity. And Lowland whiskeys are malty, grassy, delicate and subtle (turns out I’m a Lowland kinda lady).

The Grand Collection

The tour concluded with a look at the world’s largest whiskey collection, donated by Brazilian whiskey enthusiast Claive Vidiz. This stunning collection features 3,384 bottles collected over 35 years. Whether you love whiskey or hate it, it’s a sight to behold (I think I got tipsy just looking at it). On the way out we were presented with goody bags and certificates of completion, which we plan to display next to our diplomas.  

The Tour

Robert the Bruce Statue at Stirling Castle

It’s not a trip to Scotland if you don’t see a loch (lake) or something related to Braveheart—we did both. Our all-day tour took us to Stirling Castle, the Wallace Monument, Loch Lomond, the Oak Restaurant at Loch Lomond and the Auchentoshan Distillery. Unfortunately, due to icy conditions, we didn’t get to go inside the castle or the monument, but we did get to see both up close and learn more about the history. We also discovered that because no one really knows what William Wallace looked like, the statue erected in his “likeness” was made to look like Mel Gibson. Apparently, after Mel went off the deep end, Scotts were so outraged by the statue they revolted by pelting it with shrapnel. In order to protect the monument, a cage was built around it. Therefore, the current statue of William Wallace is actually a statue of Mel Gibson in a cage. I didn't see it myself, but I'm sure it's exquisite. 

The Loch Lomond experience was my favorite of all. Not just because of the spectacular views and adorable Scottish restaurant, but also because of the whimsical winter death march we took up the side of a mountain. Our tour guide John-Paul, who reminded me of a Scottish Otto from the Simpsons (not nearly as rule-oriented as Richard from our last tour), decided we should go on a walk around the loch. The ground was more of an ice skating rink, but that didn’t stop him from pressing on with the scheduled activities. In a moment of genius, he decided to make things interesting when he asked if we wanted to climb the hill beside the loch to get a better view. Inwardly I was screaming, “No!” just as someone yelled, “Yes!” Surprisingly, that someone wasn’t Josh.

Trek up hill

Us at the top of the hill at Loch Lomond

So up the hill we went. The ground, mind you, was incredibly slippery and none of us were exactly prepared for the trek. It must’ve been a hoot for any passer-bys to see a Scottish man leading two Americans, a guy from Kyrgyzstan and five teenagers from Hong Kong up a snowy hill. But like all death-defying experiences, we bonded over our challenge, taking each other’s hand and encouraging one another along the way. It turned out to be an awesome experience and the views were truly inspiring.

The highlights

Edinburgh Castle

I could go on all day, but being that this is a blog not a book, I suppose I have to start wrapping up. In short, Scotland is pretty amazing. In addition to the above, we also got to visit the Auchentoshan Distillery (part of the all-day tour), shamefully devour a 6-course truffle tasting with wine pairing at Martin Wishart’s eponymous Michelin-starred restaurant, tour Edinburgh castle, view the Crown Jewels and put our newfound whiskey knowledge to some good use. All in all, I’d say we had a very Happy Holiday!

Barrels at the Distillery

Josh at Auchentoshan Distillery

Me at Auchentoshan Distillery

Best wishes for a successful, happy, healthy 2011!